Do More of This. Have Greater Success.
Would you like to solve more problems?
Would you like to be happier?
Would you like to make more income?
Then learn to ask better questions.
Because our problems are (usually) not the problem.
Our problems are simply questions that we haven’t identified and answered adequately.
Many people don’t realise this distinction about problems.
They presume problems are a pain.
(Rather than a learning and growth opportunity.)
They think the problems they have are the problem!
They don’t realise that problems are typically symptoms, not causes.
As students of NLP — always remember that the presenting problem is rarely the actual problem.
Within every problem is a question, that if you ask it will transform the problem and help you get to your desired outcome far quicker.
Try this out:
Think of a problem you have.
For example, a common problem is:
“I’m overweight. I need to lose weight!”
Now add the missing ‘cause’ element to the statement.
“I’m overweight. I need to lose weight! [because I eat too much food and have done so for a long time.]”
Next, turn your statement into a series of quality questions to help solve the presenting problem.
So we might frame it as:
“How can I eat less food?”
“How can I eat less food and burn more calories than I consume?”
“How can I eat less food and burn more calories than I consume and feel great while doing it?”
See how a slight revision of the question makes a big difference.
The first question “how can I eat less food” is going to trigger the brain (which is survival-oriented) to close down, while the 3rd question opens up possibilities for something interesting to happen.
However, we don’t have to stop there, by shifting the frame ever so slightly we can ask even better questions like:
“How can I lose 25 lbs in 60 days while increasing my energy levels and fitness?”
Good, but sounds like work.
“How can I effortlessly lose 25 lbs by July 15th, so I look incredible for the summer?”
How about changing the verb…
“How can I get a beach body look and have 25lbs of fat just fall off me without even trying?”
Chunk up to a higher level to solve the problem…
“How can I become the kind of person who looks super fit, appears 10 years younger, and moves with abundant energy?”
Now we have a quality question that can lead to an interesting conversation and transform a life.
Questions are a powerful and underused tool of influence?
They are how you lead people to great ideas.
As a change agent, they are the secret sauce to deep transformation with your clients.
I’m curious, what's your BEST question?
What’s the most powerful question you know and like to ask friends, colleagues, or clients?
Share your answer here.
I’ll compile a list of best questions from everyone and share them in a future article.
Share this article:
Everyone has something they’d like to change in their life. I’m here to help you transform the behaviours that get in your way so you can have the life you really want.
More On NLP Times
The following seven tips, are field tested and work whether you are applying to a multi-billion-dollar business or that new start up. Use them and win.
Who do you think is happier, the top 400 richest Americans or a group of Amish? I bet you won't get it right.
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