Top 5 Things You Always Want To Do When Using NLP
Everyday people face challenges.
NLP provides many tools that can help. Regardless of which processes you use there are five things you always want to do when using NLP.
This is a review on the basics and is useful for anyone wanting to be a better problem solver or NLP change agent.
1. Define Clearly What Is The Desired State
Specifically quantify and qualify what it is that the person wants. Clarity is outcome 1. If you can't describe what the end goal is, you will have a hard time achieving it. Also if the person is in a crappy state when they are telling you what they want - they are going to provide a sub-optimal desired goal state.
So change their state first and then elicit the desired response.
2. Define Clearly What Is The Present State
The way a person thinks and articulates their present state has a huge impact on what they are noticing, feeling and doing. The brain gets metaphorically locked into seeing the pattern of the world in only one way and the client can't see a way out.
So you'll want to discover:
3. Qualify The Solution Set And Problem State
Frequently what a person first presents as their desired state is actually a presumed solution to the presumed problem. It is often articulated in a way that doesn't lead to clarity or a specific plan of action. For example "I'm broke, I want money" The obvious question is "So what?" and "what is to happen next?" Their desired statement in itself doesn't lead the brain to action.
A person came to me recently and said "I hate my job, I want to change it." If we proceeded down the rabbit hole of "changing their job" without understanding what was driving the client's behaviours and what needs they were seeking to fulfill we would of spent a lot of time creating a solution that may not have worked. The person could still have found themselves doing a new job and being unhappy.
There are many ways to discover the underlying needs and outcome a person is seeking. Three powerful questions to ask are:
Each answer points the person's consciousness in a different direction and will give you useful information to qualify the solution set.
4. Define The Change In Terms Of Behaviours
In NLP we treat thinking, feeling and doing as behaviours. When looking to facilitate a change and move someone from their present state to the desired state ask yourself:
With our example above - the client in question needed to...
Start thinking that:
Start taking actions:
And stop thinking the situation was hopeless or that feelings of apathy and despondency just arose in him etc.
[Sidenote: If someone is more attached to holding on to their problem - you will want to change that first, otherwise you may find there is no sticking power to the change.]
5. Identify What Resources Are Needed
Once you have a clear and qualified problem and solution set you can shift your focus to resources.
By mapping through the resource requirements you can quickly generate several ways to move the situation forward.
Of course that's not the end - there is still the process of how you design the strategy, effect the change and make sure it lasts.
However, that's for a future article.
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Everyone has something they’d like to change in their life. I’m here to help you transform the behaviours that get in your way so you can have the life you really want.
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